I m trying ...

17th may 2011


i only wish to say sorry...
just that i need you too much...
i m not sure whether i m a good friend...
maybe as you say...gone means gone...
in the middle of one time to another time...
there were too many events that happen in our lives...
so i cannot expect you to do the same as I wish...
i m so sorry...
it s just that i wanna others attention so much...
this is me..i m trying not to care so much...
i m trying to be satisfied...
i know i m much more better than others...
maybe i m just too greedy...
i wanna occupy every single friend of mine...
i m trying to change them...
as what i think is right...
maybe i m wrong...but it s just that i care about you...
maybe in other way of saying this...i wanna to be close to all my friends...
and leave them no place to abandon me...
but this is not going to happen...
sooner or later...we are going separate ways...
i can't live in these incomplete pieces of memories that keep on telling me that we are just friends that will remain as memory...
how i wish i m be with you...you...and you...
but i think i m no longer care about that...
i hate myself without passion...determination...courage...
friends...i don't know what to say...i seriously care about you...
but all those memories of mine don't persuade me that i can develop long lasting friendship with you....
maybe i m just a trespasser in your life...
leaving a stain and will disappear after some time...
nowadays hardly raise my moral...
kinda in blur blur...and keep moaning in my heart...
my mind went blank...
not sure whether i m picking the correct way to go...
but i shall not turn back....because i don't want...
haiz...i m having hopes to make new true friends here...
but still the same effort ...comes the same results...
no one willing to share their things with me ...
at least in secondary school..i got more friends....though just friends....but still enough to make me happy...
now feeling that i m nothing...
and i m always thinking to be someone who is excellent in every aspects...
but i m still an ordinary and very low profile person....
that s all end of story...

p/s : lurve you..my primary friends...secondary friends..and every friend of mine...